Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate;

I am the captain of my soul.

by William Ernest Henley; 1849-1903

Sucking nectar from Flowers

In The Name Of Allah Most Gracious Most Merciful.

i would like to post something strange today (like are other posts are not T.T) but i think it's really a fundamental question that needs it's deserved quantity of attention and understanding. It's something that occur to me during the last fasting month, yet somehow the thought came back to me just recently so i've decided to post it and see how others would view this matter. During my first few months in Korea i met a friend from the land of the spices, India. He is a Tiwari (surname for Indian's from the class of Brahmin, the highest social class in India) , Harsh Tiwari and i met him due to our common interest in food while selecting our dishes in the Student's cafe (he's a vegetarian and i'm a forced vegetarian). As you know being a Brahmin means you are respected but also being a Brahmin one has to adhere to a strict rules and regulation. In this world like there are good muslims and bad muslims, there are good brahmins and bad ones. Apparently he is one of the strong ones and best of all he is one of the few who are searching for the truth in his Veda, Gitas and etc. He is an electronic engineer doing his master and with his knowledge of engineering he is trying to relate their holy books with science and trying to justify the faqs in the books with our daily life now. So one night i was on my way to take some water from the water dispenser i met him, hence started a long long detail conversation which lasted until sometime before my sahur with the main topic RELIGION. Lots that i could grasp from him about the fundamental and the core of hinduism, the history, the philosophy behind the religion, the similarities between our religion, the issues of transcendence and many more. It would be hard for me to detail the details of the conversations as it has been quite some time but i would write the gist of the whole thing. One of the discussion is regarding the subject of the incarnation of god in hinduism. The 10 incarnations of god in hinduism now that i think about it most of the stories are similiar to the stories of the prophets of the past. Like for example the story of the 1st incarnation Matsya which i found similar to the Prophet Nuh A.S, the story of Vamana and the Prophet Daud A.S and other stories which i don't recall. He also relate to me the end of days in the veda where the last incarnation of God, Visnu in the form of a horse. He further explains to me that the horse is not literally a horse but something that runs with horse power, this is logic considering the modern world and what's up ahead.The principle of the religion is mothers followed by teachers over God in term of importance and the concept of polytheism in hinduism is actually a monotheism within polytheism.The purpose of me writing this is not like to comment nor judge because in suratul Kafirun Allah clearly states:

"

وَلَآ أَنتُمۡ عَـٰبِدُونَ مَآ أَعۡبُدُ

Nor will ye worship that which I worship. (5)

لَكُمۡ دِينُكُمۡ وَلِىَ دِينِ

Unto you your religion, and unto me my religion. (6)

"

but for us to take the zeal from him as he is trying so hard to fit in the society yet still remain intact with his believe and further more try to make people see the myth and legend in hiduism in the point of view of logic (of course the definition of logic and reality is different according to our believe). Hindu's don't believe in preaching as they think that as long as someone is following a good way let it be. Yet still he never fail to change how others see hinduism so they see as he sees it. May Allah guides him Ameen. So this got me thinking we are Muslims and we know that we are bringing the truth thus we spread it yet we still fail to make others view the truth as we look at it everyday. Where did we go wrong? The orders are clear the methods are lay on the floor why are we not using it?Even without intention he has made himself a good ambassador of his religion why can't we?Are we embarrass to show Islam? Please comment on this issue, Allah knows best.

NOTE: My writing here express my amazement to a new knowledge a friend conveyed to me and it is not an expression of believe. My believe is always to the One And Only, Allah. May we view the mirror in adjacent . Wasalam

To my Brother

In the name of Allah the Most Gracious, Most Merciful




I might not be the best guy in the world to tell him this, but I'm glad that my father is Raslie Saharan and my Mother is Azizah hj Abdullah. They have their good & bad points (well they are human being) but they made what i am today. The only reason I'm not that lost during my early days is because they have implanted something within me which echoes "I'm their son".Later i realize that those echoes are the adabs they taught me when I was small.These adabs are from the the practices of the Prophet, hence originally from One true Source, He knows Best.When i came back to the right road I have lots and lots of things to change. I started one by one. Its difficult u know its really is not a walk in the park. Even though I'm very-very far from being someone useful but rest assured that I'll be one insyaAllah and I don't plan this to be mere rhetoric.

Im glad that my sister is Humaira Raslie. She might not be the best sister in the world but she plays a great role in my life. U see i was like water and she is the tap..I flow she controls. what ever it is i know that I'm closer to her than anyone else in the family cos that's the way things are since we are small.We might have few conflicts when we gets older but in the end we are still the closest in the family.

Im happy that my brother is Khairi Uthman. U see back when i was small i led him to lots of dark places and only Allah knows how I regret that. But where ever we went he has been a good follower a good companion till today, that's why when my other family took me in as their usrah member, one of the first things I did first was ask them to contact my brother (he is in kuching that time) cos I know he would be a great addition in the da'wah family. He has always been the loyal one in the family.

I'm glad I am given a brother named Ali Abdul Rahman.We might not see eye to eye, but I know deep inside him he has a big dream yet to be fulfilled. When he was small I used to be a horrible brother i think, but never the less behind all those lectures i gave him is for him not to follow the path I once took. Maybe I was not good in showing this to him so i would like to apologize from my heart, I'm only human. So for him i wrote this, I x know why but i feel like i must, have to.

I'm happy because I'm given a sister named Taheera. I x get the chance to be very close to her but she knows that i care. She is trying hard to live up to the expectations everyone have for her. But I know she will not quit, she won't quit cause within her runs the blood of a fighter. Like My Nenek Aji and her daughters there is a spirit within them that will never give up even though thrown to the deepest void. The women in my big family are known fighters that is how they will continue to be.

Lastly Im glad for what I am today. I made a lot of stupid decisions in my life but InsyaAllah it is turned into valuable experiences that shape who am I today. My life's journey is still long but I am not scared nor will I give up because I have 2 Usrah waiting for me back home.The only thing i could think of now is going back one day in the future and lower my head to them while saying "Thank you".

WaAllahua'lam

Perihal Malam

Bila aku melihat pada linkaran merah jingga diangkasa malam ini,

Dari jendela aku melihat pada kesepian malam,

Terpegun dan kaget melihat sinaran terpantul dari dada kolam,

Nun jauh menyepi menyimpan rahsia seribu erti,

Entah apkah yang ada pada angin malam ini,

Mengusik kakiku dengan belaian dingin,

Beralun dengan desiran Sonata Mozart,

Kelipan api kunang-kunang bermain,

Ada khabarkah yang kau ingin beritakan padaku wahai angin?

Perihalkanlah padaku, perihalkanlah kepadaku khabar tentang jauhnya aku ini.


Ditulis bila jiwaku terusik dengan nyanyian malam disaat melihat diluar jendela kedinginan kota Seoul. 11.48PM Di Kisuksa kamar 1003. Abdullah Umar

In the end..... the question is just who U r?

Lots have happened this past few days in brought by the chilly wind of autumn. The 10 degree morning, the 16 degree afternoon, the midterm examination of level 3 Korean language for me, and etc. Too much that it makes me wonder "when u left a jar with water open in winter the water will turn to ice, but if it is not it will still turn to ice except with longer duration of the freezing process." Ain't it that way.The only way to prevent freezing in this ridiculous temperature is if you put it in your arms and the heat of your body will eventually de-catalyst the process to make it through winter at least. So in the end this is a 2 party job, it need at least 2 separate mass to make it happen, which shows that man really needs one and other. As a person would choose a jar that he/she knows. Hence the question is who are you as u choose the jar to hold for the winter. If you are careful enough you would have chosen the jar that needs you but as human being we usually don't make the right decision. Hence this led me to a bigger question that needs answering how do you know the jar is right? scientifically you can say, best way is trial and error.its scientific ain't it, but scientific methods don't usually work with human being as we consist of 2 different composition in this walking earth, the part of the physics and its brother the metaphysical side....... i'll leave it here

The juggling of brains with spoons(Please interpret it literally )

To expect the unexpected,
Makes the unexpected be the expected is it not,
But when it turns out to be the one you initially inferred to be,
you would say "ahaa" this what I've been expecting you see,

so how valid is this term "expect the unexpected" my query would be,
is the solution to this is to expect everything the mind see,
hence this queer happening arouse a question in my mind,
Is "the everything" includes the nothingness that I would find,
or it is just bounded the the truth I desire to know, I thought that I want to know,
the is an Ultimate truth that I know for sure, I know,
but where am I in this truth, sorry this I yet to know,sorry this I yet to know.

Don't Talk to me about Muhammad S.A.W

Sang by: Brother Dawud Wharnsby Ali

It would be such a pleasure to have you come along with me
I accept your gracious offer
Kindness and company
But as we walk along young man
And as you help me with my load
I've only one request as we travel down this road

Don't talk to me about Muhammad
Because of him there is no peace
And I have trouble in my mind
So don't talk to me about Muhammad
And as we walk along together
We will get along just fine
As we walk along together
We will get along

That man upsets me so
So much more than you could know
I hear of his name and reputation everywhere I go
Though his family and his clan once knew him as an honest man
He's dividing everyone
With his claim that God is One

So don't talk to me about Muhammad
Because of him there is no peace
And I have trouble in my mind
So don't talk to me about Muhammad
And as we walk along together
We will get along just fine
As we walk along together
We will get along

He's misled all the weak ones
And the poor ones and the slaves
They think they've all found wealth and freedom
Following his ways
He's corrupted all the youth
With his twisted brand of truth
Convinced them that they all are strong
Giving them somewhere to belong

So don't talk to me about Muhammad
Because of him there is no peace
And I have trouble in my mind
So don't talk to me about Muhammad
And as we walk along together
We will get along just fine
As we walk along together
We will get along

Thank you now young man
You've really have been so kind
Your genorosity and smile are very rare to find
Let me give you some advice
Since you've been so very nice
From Muhammad stay away
Don't heed his words or emulate his way

And don't talk about Muhammad
You will never have true peace
And trouble is all you will find
So don't talk about Muhammad
And as you travel down life's road
You will get along just fine

Now before we part and go
If its alright just the same
May I ask my dear young man
Who are you, what's your name
Forgive me what was that?
Your words weren't very clear
My ears are getting old
Sometimes its difficult to hear
It's truly rather funny though I'm sure I must be wrong
But I thought I heard you say
Your name is Muhammad
Muhammad

Ashaadu anlah ilaha illalla
Wa ashadu ana muhammadur rasululla

O talk to me, Muhammad
Upon you I pray for peace
For you have eased my troubled mind
O talk to me, Muhammad
And as we walk along together
We will get along just fine
As I travel down life's road
I will get along
Just fine

telitikan liriknya maka insyaAllah akan kita jumpa butir-butir kerinduan kita kepada Rasulullah SAW, "O talk to me, Muhammad, Upon you I pray for peace, For you have eased my troubled mind, O talk to me, Muhammad, And as we walk along together, We will get along just fine, As I travel down life's road, I will get along Just fine."Biarlah rindumu berbicara.